3 OTHER Things

So, when I went to set up "Three Things" on blogger, I found that the blog sites threethings.blogspot.com, 3things.blogspot.com, and the3things.blogspot.com were taken. I was immediately fearful that someone had already created a blog of lists of three and that I would, in fact, be one of those posers that I've dedicated my life to pointing out, ridiculing and eradicating. But after a quick stop by the three doppelganger blogs, I happened upon my very first list: three things that "Three Things" isn't.

1. A blog about three mundane details from my day. To be honest, I really thought the navel-gazing blog was a thing of the past. Because, to be honest, unless you're famous - no one really cares about what you watched on TV, how hard your afternoon workout was, or how much you miss your exes. As much as I'd like for that last sentence to be hyperbole, those are all actual examples of the things listed by the author of threethings.blogspot.com. Yes, seriously.

2. A blog that only ever lists three one-word unrelated things. Ever. I'm not sure how lazy one has to be to start a blog that purports to be about three things, to actually name those three things, and then to never write another thing at. Like "Pizza. Harpsichord. Green." or "Lamps. Enchiladas. Curling." or "Politics. Sports. Music." Only one of those is the actual list, I'll let you decide which. Way to go, Matt. I'll bet you're somewhere wearing Crocs, eating a KFC Famous Bowl and planning on someday getting around to that elusive first posting on 3things.blogspot.com.

3. A blog by three unpopular Asian 12 year-olds. You can tell this because my blog will never use the phrases: "We RAWK alot.", "KickSumPpl'sAss", or "miss you heaps!" Oh, how I wish I were joking. You will, however, be able to find evidence of social decay and hopelessly self-absorbed generations on both my site and the3things.blogspot.com. I've got fifty bucks that says all three of these girls won't have a boyfriend until college - of course, they've been spending their time doing something besides blogging - because there's only ever been one maddeningly vapid entry.

I'm not saying you shouldn't visit these blogs - I'm just saying the only reason you should do so is to get at least one of them to abandon the name so that I have something that you all can remember more easily to get to my blog... or to try and figure out how Sam - "The Cool Dude" didn't make my list with thethreethings.blogspot.com.